Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Marriage, Revisited

People think that when they are not cheating on their current partners they are in a monogamy relationship. True monogamy, in the animal kingdom, is defined by mating with one partner for one's entire life. Hard to imagine, isn't it? A few species, mostly birds, are actually monogamous. If their mating partner die before them, they will never mate again.

For the longest time I wondered what is the reason to get married -- as many who does not support the institution of marriage would say, "If I am faithful to him/her, does a piece of paper matter?" On the other hand, if a piece of paper does not matter, why DO people get cold feet before marriage, if it changes nothing?

I have finally found the answer to my long term quest of the meaning of marriage -- when you are in a monogamous relationship, a lot less thought went into that decision, if it's a conscious decision at all. Is it still a commitment? Sure it's a commitment of sort, a commitment that says you agree to be monogamous on a temporary and indefinitely basis with your current partner. Whereas a marriage is, hopefully at least at the time of the wedding, a commitment, sometimes in front of many friends and family that a conscious decision has been made to spend the rest of one's life with the partner and, for most, the realization of starting a family.